Insecurity is a human reality and you shouldn’t beat yourself up because you feel it. There will be circumstances when you feel insecure about a nice bikini photo on Instagram, a friend’s shiny new car, or the career success your colleague is experiencing. Whatever reason it may be, insecurity will always arise but it doesn’t mean that it is out to harm you.
Some say that you can never get away from insecurity. Although this can be true, that doesn’t mean that you will always be bound to it. Insecurity will mean nothing to you if you know how to handle it. If you are one of the many people who is facing insecurity, this article will be able to help you know what you can do to fight it.
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Identify your insecurities.
The first step to change is by knowing what you are supposed to change. The best way to know your insecurities is to practice self-awareness. Self-awareness is when you know and understand your strengths and weaknesses. Insecurity is a weakness, as a lot of people will believe, but you can channel it to discover more strengths within you.
Start by knowing the times when you are insecure. Catch yourself feeling insecure and ask yourself what it is you are insecure about. Try to be as specific as possible. Are you insecure about her hair? Her face shape? His muscles? His confidence? Once you’ve pinpointed what you are insecure about, you can now start on dealing with it.
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Break bad habits.
What do you do when you are insecure? What defense mechanism arises?
A defense mechanism is a person’s way of shielding him- or herself from rejection, anxiety, sadness, hurt, and a lot of other negative feelings. Oftentimes, defense mechanisms give a bad impression of you because there are people who can identify a change in your behavior. As much as possible, break the habit of resorting to a defense mechanism when you are insecure.
Instead, stop yourself from that habit and tell yourself that feeling insecure is a way of telling you that you can still change a bad habit, trait, or appearance of yours. Think of your insecurity as learning experience towards being a more confident you.
A bad habit can also be your repetitive actions towards not achieving your goals. Say, you want a beach body but instead of going to the gym and fixing your diet, you end up playing video games on the couch. This is the kind of bad habit that has to go. Start making steps towards your “dream you” so you can also reduce the feeling of insecurity.
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Stop pressuring yourself.
At the end of the day, you only have yourself. That is why you should stop pressuring yourself or hating yourself for your insecurities. Self-love is an important aspect of dealing with insecurity so practice this good habit.
A simple way to practice self-love is to know your strengths. If insecurities illuminate your weaknesses, strengths illuminate the good things that you have. You can write down the good traits that you know you have and look at it every once in a while. Make sure that these small pieces of paper can be in a place where you can easily find and access. You can also ask help from your friends and family members to write good things about you.
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Surround yourself with supportive people.
A big part of building insecurity is the people around you. If you surround yourself with friends who do nothing but judge each other and compare themselves to one another, then don’t expect that your insecurity will quiet down.
Find a group of people who are supportive. These are the people who will remind you of who you really are. They will guide you whenever you are insecure and they will not judge you for feeling that way. Tip: You know you’re in good company if you feel open to share your faults. Real and supportive friends create safe spaces for you and not the other way around.
These strategies sound simple, but they can be hard to practice. A key to dealing with insecurity is putting in the hard work and dedication to battle or at least manage it. People who practice self-love and confidence, and work towards their goals will not allow insecurity to get in their way.